Journey within Amal Fellowship
Well, the fellowship start was quite healthy and exciting. It was easy and fun at the start, but as time passed, the workload increased and so did the responsibilities. It was difficult to manage time. As a leader, my responsibilities were a bit more than other members.
I am an introverted person. So it was hard for me at the start to speak during the session in front of everyone. But I took my time and tried again and again. Honestly, I was shaking during my 1st 3 or 4 talks. But it gets better and better every time I speak.
In the 4th week of fellowship, there was an incident that affected the whole group mentally. Two of the members were about to quit the fellowship. That was a rough time and it was difficult for me to stay positive and make everyone calm. Somehow I was able to convince them to stay and complete fellowship.
I think that incident changed the whole circle. As for me, I saw the bitter reality that a person can do anything doesn’t matter how bad or how unethical as long as he/she is getting a benefit from that. It doesn’t matter to them if their step was going to traumatize you.
Talking about the things that disturb you and hurt is the best way to handle that disturbance. Misunderstandings can be created pretty easily and if you don’t solve them on time, they never get sorted out. I know it’s hard to find a sincere friend, who can listen to you properly. Understanding is so rare and we misunderstand everything on our own.
In this difficult time, I made a good friend from my circle. A true friend indeed, who taught me how to take a stand for what is right. How to speak up for your own good. Take a stand for what is wrong, it doesn’t matter who you are standing against. At first, I thought that wasn’t right to do but some points in the fellowship made me realize that she was right. She taught me to value myself and take credit for what I have done. Fight for my rights. I know these are some silly things but I was literally lacking there and she made me improve some of my weakest points.
“Part of being optimistic is keeping one’s head pointed toward the sun and one’s feet moving forward” ~Nelson Mendela
As we all are stepping into our professional lives, I saw some professionally immature people in the sessions. Like they might be older than me or maybe age fellow, however, more experienced and well organized than me. But their attitude was immature and they were telling stories about that proudly. Just to be clear I am not judging anyone. That was just my point of view. I know we all have a child in us. We all do immature things all the time. But showing your immaturity at a professional platform, where you come to grow personally and professionally, I don’t think that is wise.
One best thing about this fellowship was its diversity. I know I just said some unusual things about fellows’ immaturity but the diversity in this fellowship helps me to increase my level of understanding and change my point about the world. Now I see the world in a bit different way.
However, I learned a lot during this fellowship, and I think my purpose being here is complete. Some during sessions, a few through online courses, and a lot from my fellows.